Attachment disruption doesn't always look like crisis. Sometimes it looks like someone who has it together on the outside, while something underneath stays persistently unsettled.

Most of us move through our days without examining the assumptions underneath our behaviour. We just live — choosing partners, interpreting conflict, deciding how much space we deserve to take up — as if these choices emerge from nowhere. But they don't. They emerge from a set of deeply held beliefs about who we are, how relationships work, and what the world will give or withhold from us.

You understand your attachment style. You've read the books, maybe done years of therapy. You can explain, with impressive precision, exactly why you do the things you do. And then you do it again.